So I have decided from now on, mostly my diet would be dead life that were unconscious before death. Like plants, they don't fear death, they don't know they are been killed by humans for food. On the other hand, fish, goats, chicken do know pain and  may probably be afraid of dying or getting hurt. I won't eat them from now on, except for certain special occasions.

I feel like I don't have the right to bend will of conscious life so that I could be happy. Thats not right. But good taste of non-vegetarian food had seduced me and it has taken me countless hours of internal debates in my brain to come up to this decision.

I had another stuff, like shedding the notion of God and creator. That was relatively quick, it took 3 years from questioning to answer. I feel sorry for stupids who do believe in supernatural stuff. I think in future humans will have larger brains and clarity of thought that insane thoughts like god would disappear.

I also feel sorry of all the conscious life that I have killed. They have laid their life's for me, not even my girlfriend who loved me would do that, perhaps not my future wife too would do it. I hope I taste lab grown meat before I die out, I would love to eat it as it was grown without any consciousness.